In the beginning…

In the beginning God was totally munching on a taquito.

And the earth was a parking lot, and void, and darkness was upon some guys smoking Marlboros.

And God said, Let there be fluorescent light:  and there was fluorescent light.

And God saw the taquito, that it wasn’t very good, and made a firmament in the midst of the parking lot.

And God put the rest of it on a rolly thing and called the firmament 7-Eleven.

Then God said, I’m drunk.

And God made Wawa instead.

And God blessed them, saying, click all the toppings, and add extra cheese for 50 cents, and let the fowl multiply in New Jersey and Pennsylvania.

And God saw every thing that he had made, and, behold it was very good.

And he kicked back with a classic 10-inch Italian hoagie with extra vinegar but only a little bit of oil, and ate that sumbitch in the parking lot.

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